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Book Review: "The Way of the Superior Man: A Spiritual Guide to Mastering the Challenges of Women, Work, and Sexual Desire", by David Deida

This is another one of the books recommended on Stephen Nash’s website. In fact, this is the first book recommended, in that if you could only read one book from his list, this would be the one. After reading it myself, I would agree it’s a very good read. The book has relevant content, exciting prose, and a pleasing arc of completion. It is short enough to be read in an afternoon, if only because you would not be able to put it down.

“The Art of Seduction” was a little confusing to me, and I was skeptical of some of the advice due to some of the examples and the notion that seduction and power are tightly coupled. “The Way of the Superior Man” is more of an explainer for that book, with very similar assertions but a totally different vibe. For example, the former pushes the idea of the seducer and the seduced as a relationship between predator and prey. This turned me off. The latter pushed the idea of having two “poles” in a relationship, much like magnetic poles, one masculine and one feminine. The book made clear to untie this idea from man and woman, saying that both genders (and all genders) have both sides to them, but one partner must take up the masculine pole and one partner must take up the feminine pole in order for the relationship to be successful. This advice made much more sense to me, because the book mentions how relationships that remain “politically correct” in the bedroom quickly grow stale, which is something that I can see happening. It’s amazing how a little clarification goes a long way in pushing your viewpoint.

The other big thing the book pushes is the nature of masculinity and femininity, as defined in the book. The author notes one big reason men don’t “get” women is that the fact and the underlying truth are two different things. For example, if your partner is yelling at you about playing too many video games, it isn’t necessarily the fact that you play video games that’s the issue. Rather, the underlying issue is moreso that you don’t spend enough time with her, you’re lazy or don’t prioritize well, or something else about your relationship given more context. And never solve with a verbal rebuttal with what you can solve with a hug/kiss/empthatic statement.

The book offered some other advice as well in other respects of a man’s life. Regarding work, don’t settle for less than you can do, and surround yourself with relationships that will push you to that edge. The book offered a goodly amount of advice on sex as well, but I’ll probably re-read the book by the time that content is relevant to me.

After reading this book, I would say the superior man is somebody who can make up his own mind independent of what society pressures him to do; somebody who serves not only as a pole but as a fulcrum in society; and somebody who can be counted on to understand you in all regards. Who wouldn’t like somebody like that? So read this book and find out how.