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Morning Pages: April 13th, 2020

Due to the coronavirus pandemic, the D.C. metro region has been in a state of lockdown. To alleviate fear and stress, my writer's group has put together a daily “morning pages” get-together on Zoom in order to touch base before starting the day. Here's some of my brief thoughts.


I think this cake is pretty cute:

cute cake


Well, this weekend was pretty catastrophic. I think I got up @ 9:45PM on Saturday, and 7:00PM ish on Sunday. I think this is a thing now. I can't function on the weekends. I think this happened because I feel like I can't relax unless I actually have traction on my project, and it's been so long since I've touched my own project that I don't know how to relax anymore. So I don't really relax, I kind of just “crumple”, if that makes any sense. I also find myself going to bed later and later, and while I remain productive in the evenings, I've also noticed I only really start working on tech stuff in the afternoon (starting around 1PM or so), vs. the 9AM start time I'm aiming for (and the 6:30AM target wake up time in order to get my morning chores out of the way). It's pretty darn hard to forgive myself and I find this whole situation eating into my mental health. How the hell can I bite off more than I can chew in this situation anyways?

I ended up doing a whole bunch of reports at 1:00AM this morning, which coupled with the fact that being tired in the morning loses the whole day and the rainy weather from this morning, meant I didn't wake up in time for morning pages, third day in a row. This sucks, no doubt. There's really no other way to put it. I hate everything about this.

But there's no use crying over spilled milk, and there's still the rest of the day to execute on. So do a good job there, and hopefully things will turn out fine.